I am trying to learn about the mechanics of publishing books and, as you may have picked up, I tend to learn best by doing things hands-on. With this in mind, I undertook to self-publish a collection of blog posts from The Odd is Silent and Ask An Aspie, focusing on those that are humorous and/or about autism.
As you may have also picked up on, I don’t do anything without an element of fun, and often that fun comes at my own expense. Which is how you can help. I would like to have quotes about the book from other authors to put in the “praise for this book” section – these will be anything but. For example:
- That you didn’t actually read it.
- I paid you for the quote. (I will actually give you $1 if you require it for this to be accurate.)
- Conversely, that I couldn’t possibly pay you enough to waste your time reading it.
- I’m not as funny/autistic as I think I am.
- That you don’t want your name associated with it. (Which would be its own joke because of the attribution of your quote.)
- Any of the usual criticisms of my writing (too long, wrong audience, etc.) or the inverse (not long enough, insufficient detail, etc.)
- Basically anything funny you can think of that doesn’t indicate you read any of the content, or that explicitly states you didn’t read it.
I guess in a way I’m self-publishing my own roast. Do you want in on this? I would be eternally grateful. (Where “eternal” = however long trade paperback print stock lasts these days.)
Based on the types of quotes I’m looking for, reading the book isn’t actually necessary. In fact, if you follow the blogs, you have read the book. However, I’ve posted a preliminary PDF here (lo-res 9MB), and I’ll send a dead-tree version on request to anyone who contributes, once I get it to print.
Replies to this post will be considered eligible, however feel free to send them to me at email@example.com if you prefer privacy. If you know of other writers who would think this is funny (I miss CJ, he would probably have jumped on this), the more the merrier.
Apologies for the double posting if you subscribe to both blogs.
Thanks in advance!
Thanks SO much to those who have responded! These are the best “worst” book recommendations ever. 🙂 Here’s the definitive list so far:
“T.Rob tagged me on Facebook for a quote for his new book. Since I’m not as clever as the rest of his friends, I told him he could use this. This.” – Jean Marie Ward, Author of With Nine You Get Vanyr (with Teri Smith)
“I found the paper to be soft and very absorbent!” – Mike McPhail, editor at large
“T.Rob’s blog posts on autism and life’s challenges in general are insightful and compelling. And he didn’t pay me to say that, just in case anyone’s wondering. (Wink)” – Kierce Sevren, Author of various short stories
“I can still remember that night in the Charlotte police station, after we got a little rowdy at the Willie Nelson show. This guy was handcuffed to a desk beside me, and he kept going on and on about this book he was going to write. Lo and behold, he did it!” – John Elder Robison, Author Look Me In The Eye
“T.Rob who?” – Danielle Ackley-McPhail, Award-winning Author and Editor
“As a publisher, I’ve had the pleasure of reading many compelling and important books. T.Rob’s ‘Out of my Gourd’ was not one of them.” – Ron Garner, publisher and author
“Worst book about cooking I’ve ever read.” – Morag Hughson – blogger and gourd cooking expert
“This collected genius of T.Rob is a book most consider to be long overdue. But the fact that he doesn’t consider me a writer or a friend, makes me so glad I didn’t read it.” – Hannah McKelvie, co-author WebSphere Message Broker Basics
“T.Rob’s book just got ripped off the food pyramid.” Adelaide Dupont – pyramid climber and extreme foodist
“He has his name on a book. Now, so do I.” – DH Hanni, author of this comment.